Okay. I'll admit it. I was on Tinder this year. What an awful place. Whew, I survived and probably won't be going back. But if YOU are in the market and are an eligible bachelor who finds yourself on that (or any) humbling online dating site, here are a few words of gentle but sound advice.
These missteps will likely reduce your sex appeal:
No photo
No introduction statement
Your age is ≧ 0
Pictures include girlfriend OR unidentified female clinging to your neck
Majority of your pictures include your dog. Just your dog.
Head cut off in photo
Selfie in bathroom mirror (Does everyone think this is sexy?)
Toss-up, selfie in car (They sure think this is sexy!)
No clothes (Seriously, I saw more than I'd like.)
Frown or no smiling pics
Another toss-up, selfie with earbuds
All pictures include exercising
A third toss-up, posting pictures of feet, in socks, shoes, or bare
Wearing a clown costume with a blue wig. In every photo.
Misspelling the word “too”
You’re already married
Chastising anyone not searching for a hookup
Begging for a response: “C’mon ladies, swipe, please!”
There are more ellipses … than words … in your personal … statement.
Declaring: “I like to do it!”
Posting phone number because “If you don’t call, someone else will!”
Toss-up #4: Using acronyms/phrases/words requiring the use of the Urban Dictionary: ITB, sapiophile, AMA
Overusing emoticons ☹☹☹☹
Statements that life is short, so “Sister, you better take a chance on me!”
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