(knock, knock) 2011? You in there? Don't mean to disturb you but...WHOA, what have you got on your head? Editing Goggles of Unusual Size and Thickness? Seriously. Those lenses look three inches thick. Okay, well, could we have a chat out in the living room? It's October now, and your stay is almost over.
Hey, listen, you've been, well, to put in mildly, a bit of a challenge. I know, I know, you've had a lot going on, but take this deadline, for instance. I think you are going to have to kick it in gear. Yes, I understand self-editing is a challenge. Yes, I also see you've got the goggles; they certainly aren't rose-colored like the ones you owned in Asheville. But, you've gotta hump. If you don't get these edits done, well, your window is shuttered.
Then what? NaNo? You're kidding, right? But you said that was for groupies and wannabes. Oh, a love-hate thing. Can't argue there. But you shouldn't get too wrapped up in it. I mean, look at how unproductive your June and July were. Hey, now! Keep it clean. Admit it, you didn't write a thing both months, that's a fact. And no, the really bad poems don't count.
And I hate to bring up another sore subject, (pat knee), but you've got that other manuscript shoved in a folder. You don't care? Ah, but I can see behind those goggles that you do. You don't fool me. Hold on a minute, 2012 doesn't deserve to start her year with that on her plate. Have you asked her yet if she wants to be handed a bag of writhing snakes at the door? She'll know what to do? Well, maybe you're right.
So, it's been nice talking to you. Hang in there. I'll let you get back to the editing. Need anything? You know you can't drink while you're writing. A shot of sake later maybe? Fine, and hey, in January, tell 2010 I said hello.